i’ve learned a lot in my life. I’ve learned how to add, subtract, multiply and divide. i’ve learned how to scan and translate, conjugate and diagram. how to ride a bike without falling over, to throw a curve ball, make a basket, serve a volleyball, swim the butterfly and execute the perfect flip turn. i’ve learned to play concertos on the piano and the violin, learned to make loud and occasionally pleasant noises on the electric guitar and learned that i will never be a good singer — regardless of my voice lessons.

but what is that they say? that not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

it seems to me that the most important lessons i’ve learned have been the ones that don’t come with their own certificate of achievement or line on a resume. rather, they are the ones learned from relationships, they are the life lessons that sound so cliché until you’ve actually lived them.

on that note – here’s my life’s report card to date, here’s what i’ve learned thus far

that telling a fib to get yourself out of a tight corner will only make that corner even tighter (andrea taught me that one)

that you shouldn’t make a commitment you don’t intend to follow through on (ang and beth)

that the smallest good deed is far more impressive than the largest good intention (ang and beth)

that remembering something fondly is different than wanting it again (ang and beth)

that no one is perfect and placing someone on a pedestal ensures that they will topple off eventually (drew)

that placing the responsibility of your happiness in someone else’s hands is dangerous (drew)

that you have to care about someone for the right reasons (drew)

that the people you love should complement you — not complete you (drew)

that first impressions aren’t always correct (catie and jillian)

that you can’t make someone care about you (bob)

that acting differently around different people doesn’t necessarily make you a chameleon — it’s okay to be multifaceted so long as you aren’t duplicitous (jill and meryl)

that having someone care about you unconditionally can be scary and that it’s easier to push that person away than it is to accept their love (neil and lucy)

that liking the idea of something/someone is far different than liking the actual person (nathan)

that there’s a difference between keeping score and ensuring that you’re appreciated (nathan)

that at the end of the day, you have to help yourself before you can help anyone else (bob) 

that learning to care for someone because you’re committed to them is not the same as falling for them (john)

that meaningless relationships are fine, so long as you recognize them for what they are (a long list of people)

that people are not as cool as you think they are and that everyone has insecurities (jill and ashish)

that being broken hearted isn’t something to be ashamed of (chris)

that sometimes the friends you don’t pick are the ones that will stick around forever (nardozzi’s)

that everyone needs a few friends that are irreplaceable (kurti)

that expecting people to keep secrets is unreasonable (kurti)

that impressing other people can’t compensate for disappointing yourself (neil)

that believing in the irrational is sometimes the only rational thing to do (lucy and neil)

that hindsight isn’t 20/20 — it’s just a different view (neil)

that a life without risk is only half a life (tara)

that pain is just an indicator that we are really living (dan)

that false hope is worse than dashed hopes (nathan)

that sometimes what we want, is the very worst thing for us (jeffrey, andrew, alex)

that love isn’t perfect. it doesn’t fill all voids or erase all doubt. it doesn’t mean you’ve found perfection personified or that you no longer need anyone else in your life. it doesn’t do or mean anything. it just adds another dimension to your perception (jeffrey)

are those clichés? absolutely. but than again life’s a cliché – it’s all been done before, felt before, thought before, said before. there’s nothing new. never. people and the emotions they inspire are the nuances that make that sense of pointless homogony endurable.